When Daddy Tried to Kill Me by Kay

When my daddy tried to kill me
I really should have died.
Since I came out of my mother’s womb,
I have cried & cried & cried.
Life without love is not worth living
and this is really true.
The hate filled malignancy of others
is all that’s there for you.
They push & shove & cuss & hate.
Everyone on the planet, it seems
is on your plate.
Your brother’s & your sisters,
they took your daddy’s cue.
Since they are all successful,
they turned a whole town against you.
They told everyone you were crazy
& swore to GOD it was true.
Stealing, pillaging, and slandering.
The world can’t get it’s fill.
There’s no end to the atrocities
reserved for the mentally ill.
& when they are through with you
& you know your proper station,
you have to watch in silent horror
as it falls to the next generation.
And after that, another,
just like the one before.
All the hell & hatred in the world, until the world’s no more.

shared and written by Kay

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Battered Wife – dealing with the solitude after domestic violence by Angela Hutcherson-Jenkins

I’m standing looking in the mirror
She’s not there anymore I fear
The young girl with the dreams
Of first kiss, being loved, many things

Meeting him, love at first sight,
Being kissed under the star light
Weekend nights shared partying with friends
Disagreeing with boyfriend, then making amends

Finally getting license, then first car
Getting job, money to drive afar
Learning about nature, traveling the earth
Learn to skydive, even to surf

Smiling and laughing, planning dream wedding,
Exchanging vows at the perfect setting
News of baby brings such happiness
Doesn’t mind body changes, hair a mess

Comforted in her husbands devoted love
Feeling she’s blessed from heaven above
That’s not me, not my life
Instead I became a battered wife

by Angela Hutcherson-Jenkins
xeson@yahoo.com

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Finally – Dealing with the solitude after domestic violence by Angela Hutcherson-Jenkins

I quietly close the door
Quickly securing the lock
Leaning against the door
I close my eyes
Finally I sigh heavily
Realizing I made it
I finally did it
I made it safely
Taking a deep breathe
I can do this
For I’m stronger now
I promised myself that
Things will be different
No more fear-filled days
Nor terror sleepless nights
Awakening to unfounded accusations
Marked with swollen bruises
Shame lowering my head
A smile slowly forms
I raise my head
I had finally left
I open my eyes
Glancing around in amazement
At my new home
Acceptance enters my eyes
My heart starts racing
Because my reality returns
I acknowledge sadly that
I still feel fear
Yet I smile for
Someday fear will leave

by Angela Hutcherson-Jenkins
xeson@yahoo.com

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No More by Ashley P – poetry about domestic violence

I received the following comment against another post on http://www.the-laststraw.com and wanted to share it with you here. The following comment was left on 2010/09/02 at 2:42 pm:

I was in an abusive relationship for 3 years and he abused me in all aspects. I found the will the leave him when he attempted to hit me while I was 3 months pregnant with our son. At that moment, I couldn’t leave for myself, but I could leave for my baby and I was gone the next week. It’s been a difficult journey because I still see this man and speak to him because of the child we share. He has continued to be verbally, emotionally and once even physically abusive to me in front of our son. We go to court at the end of the month and I’m praying the court will see the kind of man he is and will help me in protecting myself and my son. I wrote the following poem depicting my journey and my realization. I could only be his victim as long as I allowed myself to be and I refuse to be his victim. I hope you all enjoy this poem:

-NO MORE- By Ashley P.
A life that has for so long been controlled by manipulation and fear, So many times left broken and in tears.
Broken bones and bruises followed by promises allowed to heal, Names and accusations, confusion at the appeal.
Was it really appeal, or just a distorted view?
A victim of the lies, a victim of “I don’t know what to do”.
Attempts to do what’s right, attempts to inspire change,
Feelings of defeat when things remained the same.
A will to be happy, a will to stand fear in the face,
Determination to finally escape this dreadful place.
Emergence out of darkness, finally able to see the light,
Finally the courage to stand up and fight the fight.
No more being afraid, no more running away,
No more looking back and living like yesterday.
No! no more being afraid, not one more excuse,
No longer a victim, but a survivor of abuse.

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Everything You Gave Me – poetry about domestic violence – the aftermath

When I was married to my abuser he used to tell me “but I give you everything” my reply with divorce papers was this…

All these things you’ve given to me
Bruises, Marks,
Screams, Hurts,
Unfounded Accusations…
Total isolation…
Threats, Terror,
Nightmares, tears,
Emotional High…
Worried I’ll die…
Low self-esteem,
Hurtful remarks,
Unwanted lust…
Slaps, Mistrust…
Broken bones,
Hitting, Pushing,
Shoving, Fighting…
Endless lying…
Humiliation, Misuse,
Emotional abuse,
No Friends, No family, No Help
Is this really what love is?

Poem was printed with permission from the talented author
Angela Hutcherson-Jenkins
she offers many poetry books free to download and hardcopies for sale at lulu.com/xeson

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Unbelieved – poetry about domestic violence and the jealousy

Unbelieved

Can’t go to the police
I don’t want to admit…
I’m frighten of my spouse
When in an uncontrollable fit…
The constant screaming and shouting
Being accused of having affairs…
Being woken from sleep to
Death threats, and hate filled stares…
All my calls are monitored
I hate when the phone rings…
Secret meeting with my lover
To arrange, so it seems…
Never interact with my coworkers
Ignore every opposite sex friend…
Talking to them i’m accused
A sexually invitation I send…
Can’t go living this way
Have to change my life…
But, who will believe a
Husband abused by his wife…

Poem was printed with permission from the talented author
Angela Hutcherson-Jenkins
she offers many poetry books free to download and hard copies for sale at lulu.com/xeson

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Abuse and Lies … no more … I am worth it

I wrote this poem six months ago when someone pointed out that our first real relationship sets the tone for future relationships…it made me think of my first relationship at the age of 15 which lasted 3 years…and this person sadly lingered for an additional 3 years in my life on and off…I was searching for somewhere to share it and came across this site…I hope it helps someone…

Abuse and lies…no more…I am worth it!
by Luz Barbosa
http://luzestela.tumblr.com/
http://luzestela.tumblr.com/

he tells me not to look that way
he tells me not to dress that way
he tells me not to talk that way
he tells me not to act that way

he smacks me
he tells me I better shut up or else
he tells me I am worthless
he tells me my no’s are meaningless
he doesn’t care that I don’t want to or that I am crying

he tells me he loves me
he tells me I am his and I will always be, that he owns me
he tells me no one will ever love me like he does

he tells me I am stupid
he tells me I am a hoe
he tells me he will kill me

he sucks the life out of me

I finally had enough
I could not continue to live this way
I realized these were all lies
I decided this behavior was unacceptable
I finally got out

I was young
I didn’t know any better
I kept it to myself
I was ashamed
I lived in fear

I refuse to be controlled
I refuse be abused
I refuse to end up dead

I deserve to be safe
I deserve respect
I deserve to be loved
I deserve to be happy
I deserve to be free to be me
I deserve to be treated well

I am worth it!

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