I Sceam – living with Chronic Pain

I SCREAM!

I scream
just scream
they tell me it don’t hurt that bad
how could there be so much pain
you look so damn incredible
stop complaining and they turn their head
I scream
Just hold my hands beside my fears with your judgment still ringing in my ears
I scream
I kick out all the windows and from inside myself escape
Shattered from the bits of glass so deep you can not see
when I leave your view the pain of me is gone
I scream
I just hold my hands beside myself and try to comprehend
this madness deep inside my head, too deep for it to mend
don’t dare to touch it hurts to holdso deep inside you think you see
someone strong and brave in me
no pills for piece of mind
no bit of words you say
even though you’ve the degree
don’t stand and be the judge of me
you, you know me in a minute
I ask once more did you hear me sir
as you walk me to the door
I’m sorry miss
You’re much too young
your referral’s at the desk
I know he thinks as he walks me to the door
God, she sure is beautiful can’t believe she could be ill
my life will never be the same,
even if I stick around to live it
I’ve lost that one thing your supposed to hang on to
and sometimes the strength to be without it
Today again, I try to look my best and burst right through them doors
I came in so determined and again, you knocked me to the floor
you think that I will go away crawl into a hole
someone, someday will understand
the me beneath an illness that has consumed me with such fury
shut your folder sit and relax you’ve done your job you think
you only dabble in that this week
I could hardly keep my emotions together
but hey, what must it be like living in such pain 24/7
besides you think, if she’s in so much pain, she should be kissing my feet,
and stop that damn complaining
oh well, five o’clock, time for you to head home, your family and a good night’s rest
without the worry of me, after all, I’m out of view

Copywritten Rebecca J. Burns – please email to use poem or at least give credit and link to site

Advertisements

Read Full Post »

Pain Pain Go Away – living with chronic pain

PAIN, PAIN GO AWAY!

I pick up the phone
Another Call
She wishes she were dead
She wants to flee her devastating pain
The pills stack inside her
One on top of the other
Doing so much harm to help her
Walk across the floor
Some get few side effects
Lucky gal
She gets them all
Today she only gets up for a quick trip
To the bathroom
Maybe a sip of water
And her aching belling will be full
After all food seems foreign these days
And she seems to do without
Her frail body climbs back under
The toasty blanket
That weighs more than her
She dreams of a world
Without so much pain
She would miss her babies
But she doesn’t feel she can
Take another day
A day of swelling in all her joints
Of no strength to lift her head
To say good morning to her sons
A day of crying just because
It seems all she has the energy to do
Chronic Fatigue some laugh
Isn’t that what all parents of small Children have?
But you look so beautiful young lady
How could you be sick?
Don’t laugh or question her please
It breaks what strength of hope she has
Be happy it is not your life
I write about tonight
I feel so sad inside
I tell her I can’t begin to feel her pain
I just try to write some words of comfort
and always have an ear
She knows nothing of the pain I feel
It too is physical at times
I wish so much for her
To live without pain
To walk without falling
To cry without such sadness
My tears again fall as I say my
Nightly prayers
Prayers she was in long before
She became so sick
Long before she was so sad
Prayers I hope to have answered tonight
She says she wants to leave without
Saying good-bye
I understand that much
She just wants to smile and live again
Pain,
Pain,
go away
Let her live another day
Pain,
Pain,
go away
Pain,
Pain,
Go Away

Copywritten Rebecca J. Burns
please post here for permission to use poem or at least give credit and link to site.

Read Full Post »